Hannah isn't feeling well. She isn't sleeping well. But she isn't stay-home-from-school sick. Depending on how you define the term. But for the past few days when we get to school, she wants me to sit by her. And then play with her. And then take her with me. This isn't her healthy-Hannah routine. This is a tired, not-feeling-so-good Hannah move. And words cannot express how much it breaks my heart to say no to that request from either Hannah, but especially a not-feeling-so-good Hannah. And to hear her cry as I walked out the door. It just hurts. I've been calling each morning to see how she is doing, and every time, she is playing and happy. Which makes me feel better, sort of. But I just can't shake this feeling that my family needs more of me than my full-time job is leaving them.
A new study just came out saying working moms are happier and healthier than stay at home moms. But part-time working moms come out on top: they are as happy as full-time moms, as involved as SAHMs and the most responsive to their children of the three. I think could really go for part time right about now.